See Anna Mope

This little blog started as See Anna Run, but if I had been posting regularly the last few weeks, it would be more like See Anna Mope. I'm still injured, with no end in sight.

I'm not going to the Little Rock Marathon. 

I still can't run. My hip is better than it was in early January when I stopped running, but running is still painful. I took a solid 4 weeks off -- thinking that lots of rest, stretching and massage would do the trick. But nope. I tried running last weekend, and it was awful. All 1.75 miles of it. It hurt from the first step, but by the time I got back to my car, I was miserable and limping. I could barely walk the next day. So I decided to see another doctor -- someone who specializes in sports injuries and hips and who isn't a chiropractor or a massage therapist.

It took a while to get an appointment, so I just saw the doctor this morning. They took x-rays, which were normal and showed nothing. So he recommended an MRI. But because of where the pain is and because of how long it's been going on (years, but with a recent debilitating flare-up), I have to get a special MRI where they will inject dye into my hip joint. He said it's possible that the cartilage in the socket of my hip could be torn, and that wouldn't show up on a regular MRI. But he has no idea whether that's actually the issue or not. No way to know until I get the scan. Hopefully this will tell us whether anything is torn, or if things are just inflamed. And the kicker?

I can't get an appointment for my radioactive MRI until February 27! Three weeks from now! (It's done at a local hospital, not the clinic I went to, so there's nothing they can do to speed things up.) And I won't find out the results until March 1 when I meet with the doctor again. So the only diagnosis I received today is that I get to spend another month not running. Also not biking. Also no exercise that puts any impact on my hip -- which is basically ALL of it. He says I can swim, but I don't really know how. I've been trying to learn, and the only thing I know so far is the breaststroke.

BUT he said I specifically can't do the breaststroke because the frog-leggish kick will aggravate my hip. So...I'm not sure where that leaves me. Attempting freestyle and gasping for air, I suppose. I'm also allowed to use the recumbent bike at the gym. Not a regular bike and not the elliptical. A recumbent bike, with all the grandmothers.

So after all that, I spent 45 minutes crying in the parking lot of the doctor's office, feeling sorry for myself. I have worked so hard, only to have an injury shut it all down. No Little Rock Marathon. I won't even be able to run the Bentonville Half Marathon at the end of March. After the first two weeks of rest, I knew that when I wasn't better at that point, that I wouldn't have time to train for Little Rock. I accepted that a while ago. But this whole time, I've believed I could run Bentonville. But I can't. I won't even have a recovery plan until 4 weeks before the race. Something that I thought would be a setback for a couple of weeks has turned into an injury that's ruining my entire spring season. When (if?) I'm able to run again, I'll be completely starting over. Learning to run 1 mile at a time. 13.1 is going to seem outrageous by March.

I realize that in comparison to basically anything else, this isn't an actual problem. My gait has pretty much returned to normal. The pain has gone away enough that I can sleep through the night. I'm not on crutches or in a cast. I just can't run. For normal people, this doesn't matter. When I've been sad, most responses have been, "That sucks. Oh, well. Just go to the pool or go for a walk and you can do those races next year."

But it's about more than just these races.

It's what I've worked for. It's about watching celebration over running 6 miles for the first time, 10 miles, 20 miles, fly right out the window. It's about facing how hard it will be to start at 0. AGAIN. Yes, folks, I'm mourning my fitness. I know, I know, it's ridiculous. People have actual illnesses that prevent them from living normal lives, and I'm whining because I can do a million things, but I can't run. But I LOVE to run.

So tomorrow, I will deal with it. Tomorrow, I will go to the pool, try not to drown, and I will figure out a new plan to stay active and get me to March 1. But today? Today I'm just really sad.

Status: Injured

Hey, remember me? I've been busy learning new words lately...like piriformis, gracilis, and iliopsoas. 

I have a hip injury. 

I've had issues with my hip since college. When I started running last year, that aggravated the problem, but it's never kept me from running. Until now. My piriformis and everything around it is all angry and tight, and I haven't run since New Year's weekend. For the last couple of weeks, I've been limping around with some serious, constant hip pain. 


Since I can't run, I've had to learn to cross train and try anything and everything for recovery. I've spent time on the bike trainer watching John Hughes movies, I've seen my chiropractor more often than I care to think about, I've had 4 massages in 2 weeks, and I take every chance I get to stretch inappropriately in public. My hip is getting better, but not better enough to run just yet. 


Oh, and did I mention, the Little Rock Marathon that I'm supposed to be training for is about 6 weeks away? And I haven't run farther than 10 miles since the Memphis Marathon in early December. Things are not going well. 


I've also taken up aqua jogging to try to help my legs and lungs not forget what to do when it's time to run again. This is a new low. 

Aqua jogging is good for moving those running muscles, but it's nowhere near the same level of difficulty as actual running. I tried swimming instead just to get a better cardio workout, but I quickly remembered why I never finished swimming lessons when I was a kid. I swim like a rock, and I hate the water. But the good news is that flailing about and trying not to drown can still make for a decent workout. Luckily, I have a fantastic friend who isn't afraid to wear a floaty belt and has kept me company during pool rehab. 

So, the big question is, will my hip heal in time for me to train for Little Rock? I don't know. I kind of doubt it. My doctor said I can try running again when the pain is 100% gone, but it's not completely gone yet. But even when I do start back, he said not to go run any crazy long distance, like 6 miles or something. 6 miles?! Like that's far? My plan says 16 for this weekend. But I realize that's not going to happen. 

So I'm incredibly sad, disappointed, and all around frustrated with how things are going. The race I trained half a year for went horribly wrong, and Little Rock was supposed to be my do-over. My chance to get it right. But I just don't see how that can happen at this point. I know there are other races, and this shouldn't be a big deal. But I've already registered. The half is sold out, so I can't drop back to a shorter distance. Trea has registered for the full and is still planning to run. So have several of my friends. It's one thing to miss a race, but it's another thing to miss the race you chose that was your idea while you watch everyone else you know running it. And the Little Rock medal? Is HUGE. I want one. 

It's been a rough couple of weeks, but I'm trying to focus on the fact that I'm getting better, even though it's happening WAY too slowly. I'll just keep stretching and resting and we'll wait and see what happens. 

What's next?

Thank you all so much for your kind words of encouragement these last couple of weeks. I know I beat myself up quite a bit in my last post, and I really appreciate your helping me put things into perspective. I finished a marathon, and that's all that matters. So, now what?

I feel like I need a do-over. Another race to prove that I can really do this, you know, without power puking all over an entire city. So I signed up for the Little Rock Marathon! It's on March 4, so I think I have enough time to get prepared for it. I've been a sloth the last couple of weeks since Memphis, and I'm determined to get back into my running groove.

Although I've been super lazy lately, I think it's good just to stop sometimes and reflect on all that's happened and just be happy with what I've accomplished before moving on to the next thing. So...I made a cheesy slideshow of training and race photos. Lame? Yes, but in an awesome way. Check it out. Mind you, this may not work in mobile or Google Reader.



I'm so excited that I'll have even more friends running this next race, including Laura, Jennifer and Trea, and John will be running his first full! I'm sad that Lori won't be running at Little Rock, but I'm sure she'll kill her marathon PR at another race this spring. We've all gotten hooked, and I couldn't be happier to have such a fantastic support system...especially since we all just signed up to train through the dead of winter! Let's hope Santa leaves some YakTrax in my stocking.